


Ben the Duck

by cblavoie



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:33:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27193822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cblavoie/pseuds/cblavoie
Summary: Crowley creates mayhem with a duck... Story that popped into my head based on a meme about an angry duck who's actually a goose.
Kudos: 1





	Ben the Duck

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Angry Duck](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/705130) by Unknown. 



“Angel, it’s me. I’m on my way to pick you up to go to the park,” Crowley drawled through the cell phone. He didn’t give Aziraphale a chance to answer as he hung up and looked at the duck sitting stately beside him. Nearly drifting into the miraculously available parking spot in front of the old bookshop, he grabbed the duck and rushed to the shop.  
Aziraphale looked up brightly, his smile quickly fading as he noticed the duck in Crowley’s arms. “My dear boy, why do you have a duck? Do I even want to know?”  
“Meet Ben!” Crowley exclaimed as he held up the duck who looked quite aggrieved to be in the arms of the demon.  
“Explain yourself,” was all Aziraphale retorted.  
Crowley sighed. “All right, if you really must know, I ran into him this morning.”  
“Ran into him? What, you met a duck on the street and introduced yourself?” Aziraphale looked incredulous.  
“No, no, I mean I RAN into him. The Bentley ran into him. I got out to make sure he was ok and then a stroke of genius hit me! I was near some homes, so I put him near the door of an old cat lady.” Crowley looked at Aziraphale innocently.  
Aziraphale rubbed his eyes. “It’s much too early for this and I’m much too sober. Why on Earth would you put a duck at a lady’s door?”  
Crowley cackled. “They’re rotten creatures, he kept hissing and blocking the door as she tried to leave. At one point the cat came out to see what the fuss was about and Ben here BIT him!” Crowley was laughing maniacally by this point. “Oh you should have heard her! “Peaches, no, oh my Peaches!” he mimicked through his laughter. “She actually told the duck she was going to call the police!” Aziraphale looked bewildered.  
“Crowley, ducks don’t behave that way, that’s geese you’re thinking about. And Ben is NOT a goose. You must have demonically influenced him into behaving as such.” Crowley sobered immediately.  
“Well shite, I didn’t think of that. Think they’ll get suspicious, a rabid duck running around?” he asked.  
“Ducks can’t get rabies. But they’ll probably assume she saw a goose and mistook it for a duck,” Aziraphale reassured.  
Crowley looked sheepish. “She got a lot of photos…”  
Aziraphale shook his head. “Anthony J. Crowley, I can’t leave you alone for five minutes without something ridiculous happening,” he sighed as he snapped his fingers. “There, all the pictures are now of a goose. Let’s go get Ben to the park before you do something else,” though there was no sting in his words and a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “But Ben sits in the back seat on the way to the park,” he said as they walked out of the bookshop. At this, Ben quacked and pushed out of Crowley’s arms, flying into the sky. Angel and demon stared a moment, then laughed together. “Dinner at the Ritz, dear? I believe a table for two just opened.”


End file.
